Wednesday, January 7, 2009

A Not So Fun Way to Spend Two Weeks

Getting the flu is like getting mugged. It’s quick and violent and catches you off guard. For days after, you are shaky and a little afraid to leave your house.

A cold however, is a progressive attack. Something akin to the escalating aggression of a schoolyard bully. A sneeze points out your vulnerability and from there, it’s on! Over the next week or two, the cold will bop you on the nose making you speak funny, steal your lunch money (redistributing it towards many overpriced cold remedies) and publicly humiliate you (Sniffling? Red rings around your nose? So very attractive). And then it will lose interest in you and move onto someone else… probably a friend you complained about being sick to.

Of course, everyone has their folksy wisdom about what cures a cold or flu. And there are many theories on how to catch a cold as well (I’m pretty sure it has more to do with being around sick people than being in the rain without a coat… sorry mom). In the end though, despite almost drowning in a sea of orange juice, taking enough airborne tablets to choke a horse, and keeping a positive mental attitude, I just can’t seem to shake th… a… a… achoo!
posted by jw